Culture Shock: Brazil x USA

There are a few things I learned growing up, as a Brazilian girl, and I didn't realize they were not what everyone else in the world learned until I moved to the US.

1.       Do NOT throw paper in the toilet.

In the restroom of a lot of establishments you go to in Brazil, you will see these signs: 

So, for me, I grew up thinking you were like the most evil person in the world if you threw your toilet paper in the toilet. It was mind blowing to know people in the US thought the exact opposite was rude or not acceptable.

Even though a lot of establishments have these signs, others take it for granted that everyone knows it is wrong to do so. So, it is good you know not to throw paper in the toilet when you visit Brazil, otherwise you might clog the pipes.

2.       Shake people’s hand and give them a cheek kiss!

When someone is introduced to you, you shake their hand and give them a “cheek kiss”, that was what I was taught. The number of kisses: 1, 2, or 3 depends upon the part of the country you are in or family tradition. A cheek kiss means that you don’t actually touch your lips on the other person’s cheek, you rather touch cheeks and make a kiss sound with your lips. Don’t know why, don’t ask me.

Result: In a club in US, my friend introduced me to a boy, friend of hers. In an automatic mode I advanced into his “personal space” – Jeez, I had no idea that existed either – to give him a cheek kiss, as I held his hand. The whole scene was hilarious, because the hand shaking looked like I was holding him still for my master attack. I watched in slow motion as he opened his eyes and mouth in shock, threw his head back, hitting it against the wall (that must have hurt, we all heard the impact). I wish I had that on video. I let go off his hand, asked if he was okay, and clarified what my intentions were. He blushed, gave me a cheek kiss, and I held in my almost impossible to control desire to laugh.

The rule I came up with after that event is - not that I am able to follow this rule all the time: watch what the other person you were introduced to is starting to do. Weather a nod, hand movement for a hand shake, or a step into your personal space for a cheek kiss.

3.       Whaaaaaaat??? I ain't got no contagious disease!!!

More about personal space, I have to say that now that concept is very useful to me. It makes total sense. I just never needed it before my experience abroad. After meeting people from all over the globe, I realized that people from a few nationalities did stand by my side closer than I was comfortable with. Before I learned about this personal space thing, I thought some people in the US had prejudice against me, because as we were making conversation they would discreetly step a bit away from me. In my head I used to think like: What??? I ain't got no contagious disease!!! Why are you doing that?

4.       Can’t touch this!!!

No, you may not touch a Brazilian girl’s butt (not that you can touch other nationalities', but I just know about my own). One of the things I was most shocked about American culture was the way people dance in clubs. It is definitely very different than what we do in Brazil. In US it is common for boys to dance standing behind the girl, and more than that, it’s not just some symbolic movement, they touch while dancing (I'm being explicit so Brazilians who have never seen this can picture it).I watched it over and over during the time I was living there. I visited different states (6 of them) and I have been to different kinds of bars/clubs, different kinds of music, some cheap places, some expensive ones… but the situation described happened in all of them, no exception. So I came to think it is a pretty common practice.

Long story short, on the first night I went out, my friends and I were dancing in a circle. A boy approached me from behind, and that was nothing but a sexual assault to me. I called security immediately. The guy was confused and said he was sorry multiple times, and I was almost crying in fear. In Brazil, on the other hand, it is common and okay to kiss. But again, when kissing, nobody has given you permission to touch the girl’s butt or boobs, so don’t just assume you can.

With the benefit of internet and globalization I think people should just read a bit before travelling to other countries. I've had some funny and some not so funny moments with culture shock. I hope this was amusing to you all and that it can help you understand Brazilian girls a bit better for the next time you meet one.